With Joe Biden’s inauguration less than five days away, some amazing coincidences have occurred.

Gov. Andrew Cuomo, who has casually destroyed New York for 10 months, abruptly announced that it was time to reopen the economy.

At his State of the State, Cuomo said, “We simply cannot stay closed until the vaccine hits critical mass. The cost is too high. We will have nothing left to open. We must reopen the economy, but we must do it smartly and safely.”

When the cost of destroying New York’s economy meant hurting Donald Trump, he was more than willing to pay the high price. Luckily, the governor’s buddy won the White House. Now that things are heading in the left’s direction, Andrew can afford the change of heart.

Unfortunately for hundreds of restaurants in New York, the cost of Cuomo’s political games means they will never reopen their doors.

Fredo’s older brother wasn’t the only official to make an unexpected U-Turn on reopening. Mayor Lori Lightfoot, “the public face” of Chicago, said that restaurants and bars need to be allowed to reopen “as quickly as possible”.

I wonder if the mainstream media will be as critical towards Lightfoot and Cuomo for wanting to reopen the economy as they were towards Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis. I doubt it.

But relaxing lockdowns is not the only trend that will be back in fashion now that Jack Dorsey’s preferred candidate is in the clear. Let’s go over some of the trends that will make a comeback now that President-elect Biden is here to save the world.

For the foreseeable future, the American media will begin producing pure puffery — in fact, they’ve already started. Stories are sprouting up about Dr. Jill’s fashion sense and even how Jeni’s ice cream (Pelosi’s go-to dessert) is recreating Joe Biden’s favorite ice cream flavor in honor of his upcoming inauguration.

Who needs to read about Hunter Biden’s DOJ investigation when you can devour a story about “White House Chocolate Chip,” a pint of vanilla ice cream with crunchy chocolate flakes and chocolate-covered waffle cone pieces!

There is no longer a need for Jim Acosta to scream questions at the President in the Rose Garden, which is why he has already decided to step away from the White House beat. Acosta’s job was not to be a reporter. It was to harangue Trump. His skill set would not transfer over to covering the new administration.

The shift back to a pandering and pathetic press happened faster than expected. Call me naive, but I thought the outlets would try their hand at subtlety.

I was wrong.

NPR, which refused to cover the Hunter Biden scandal because they don’t want to waste readers time “on stories that are not really stories,” ran this hard-hitting piece last week: “Biden’s German Shepherd, A Rescue Dog, To Get ‘Indoguration.’”

Major hasn’t received this much coverage since a few weeks back when his owner, post-shower, tried to yank his tail. This dog better ready himself for some major spotlight. Who knows, he might be asked to star alongside his Joe in some hilarious BuzzFeed sketches.

Another oldie but goodie that is sure to return?

The White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner will once again be a highly publicized and celebrated event. Often described as “nerd prom,” this self-congratulatory snoozefest lost its mojo over the years. That might have something to do with the fact that Trump did not attend during his presidency. He thought it was a waste of time (spoiler alert: it is).

But fear not, Democrats with press passes — your fancy ball is bound to come back bigger and better than ever before. After all, nothing says “return to normalcy” like watching arrogant, self-important elitists pretend that they can laugh at themselves.

(Don’t worry, Joe. Even though you are ripe for ridicule, most of the jokes will likely still be aimed at Orange Man.)

With Trump not there for the press to kick around anymore, there’s one trend that I hope comes back in a big way.

You see, fawning coverage of Joe “above the fray” Biden might make the Brian Stelters of the world feel warm and fuzzy, but I have a funny feeling it’s a disaster for ratings.

One can only hope.

P.S. Hope is back in style, too.

Posted in Politics

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